My Uncle Said I Had To Post
I have once again been shamed into posting. I hate to say it, but I am in the midst of the Groundhoggiest of Ground Hog Day Syndromes. There jus' ain't nuttin to say! I can't write about the cool stuff that happens around here cause of security and stuff. The last thing I want is the Secret Squirrels mad at me. Overall, life is pretty good right now. I just got my 2nd South Carolina String Band CDs at mail call today. Now I can work out to the rousing strains of "Goober Peas", "Rose of Alabama" or the ever-motivating "Richmond Is A Hard Road To Travel" (It is an acquired taste, unfortunately for my Bride I done acquired it. I made her listen to Bobby Horton's Homespun songs all the way from VA to Texas and back again. For that matter, I forced us stop at Shiloh and Vicksburg. Wanted to stop at Chickamauga but ran out of daylight. I probably have the only kids in the neighborhood that know all the words "Stonewall Jackson's Way") So overall, I am a pretty happy camper WITH ONE NOTABLE EXCEPTION:
WHERE'S THE FREAKIN' CHEESE!!!!!
It has been a dog's age since I have had any cheese. We have had at least three resupplies of subsistence and there is still no cheese at the chow hall. I am about to the point where I will rat f**k (a technical military term meaning: To rummage through package or container, taking only what you desire and leaving whatever nasty crap is left for others who are slower than you. See also Darwin's theory of natural selection) a case of MREs for the simulated cheese spread. I NEED CHEESE! My cholesterol level is dropping dangerously and my eliminations are far to regular. I bet they have cheese in Iraq for cryin' out loud. With all the goats running loose around this country you would think we would at least have fetta leaking out our ears! The menu still says "Grilled Ham and Cheese Sandwiches" but there ain't no cheese in 'em. I know I looked. I think I am a fairly good judge of what cheese looks like and that just ain't it. We get our subsistence from Germany and that is the land of Cheese (and chocolate). This situation is simply intolerable, how do expect me to keep doing whatever my Ham and Cheese Sammich tell me to do. I can't understand what the hell my sammich is trying to say, without the Cheese, it has an unintelligible accent!
TO THE TYRANT NEVER YIELD
WHERE'S THE FREAKIN' CHEESE!!!!!
It has been a dog's age since I have had any cheese. We have had at least three resupplies of subsistence and there is still no cheese at the chow hall. I am about to the point where I will rat f**k (a technical military term meaning: To rummage through package or container, taking only what you desire and leaving whatever nasty crap is left for others who are slower than you. See also Darwin's theory of natural selection) a case of MREs for the simulated cheese spread. I NEED CHEESE! My cholesterol level is dropping dangerously and my eliminations are far to regular. I bet they have cheese in Iraq for cryin' out loud. With all the goats running loose around this country you would think we would at least have fetta leaking out our ears! The menu still says "Grilled Ham and Cheese Sandwiches" but there ain't no cheese in 'em. I know I looked. I think I am a fairly good judge of what cheese looks like and that just ain't it. We get our subsistence from Germany and that is the land of Cheese (and chocolate). This situation is simply intolerable, how do expect me to keep doing whatever my Ham and Cheese Sammich tell me to do. I can't understand what the hell my sammich is trying to say, without the Cheese, it has an unintelligible accent!
TO THE TYRANT NEVER YIELD
posted by Ed | 1/12/2004 08:38:00 AM
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